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As with the start of every year, I find myself in a blur of optimism. In fact, at this exact moment, I feel I can accomplish anything. However, experience can be a cruel teacher. In the back of my mind, I expect to fail. I expect to be tempted and weaken. But isn’t this the nature of anyone who battles with weight loss. I should always be aware that temptation is stronger than expectation. Temptation is definite. I know what I want. I can taste it. But to expect that I will not give in on this first day of a New Year, a new decade, is a big challenge.

I embrace that challange. It will always be a battle. But with small victories I can eventually reach the benchmarks toward a healthier life. 2009 was one of my most stressful years. But at the end, I did not do too much damage. 2010 brings new perspective. So right now I close my eyes, accept myself and continue on the next small victory.

I can’t believe it has been more than a year since my last post. I do need to revisit my goals. I realize that time will not allow me to put off any longer the need to be healthier. In the last year I have little to show. But I know I can’t resign to what hasn’t happened. I have to accept what has to happen. I might even be bold enough to make a personal pact. Now is the time - to renew.

Lately, I’ve been slipping out of control. Mindless eating is so easy, but it always doubles with a backlash of guilt. And what do you do when you feel guilty or bad about yourself - eat! Alright. The good news is it’s never too late to pause and think of what’s the right thing to do. To start the journey again. I’d love to blog more - but the treadmill is calling. Hang in there, everybody.

I’m sorry. I’ve disappeared for a while. Things have been a bit hectic. But I decided to participate in the weight-loss challenge at work. Tomorrow is the first weigh-in.  (I’m not expecting anything great.)  I think the progam may be a good thing. Its design is simply one of support and information sharing.  No pressure.  I eventually agreed with my great Buddyslim friends. Why not try it?

Lost another pound. (Whee!!) I’ve been mostly faithful to the diet. And I remember from past weight loss efforts, the beginning is mainly water. But I’ll take any measure of success.  Now.. my decision. My workplace is offering a weight loss challenge. Details are vague. On one hand, I feel good about the past few weeks. I think I have a great start. And the extra support on the homefront can be helpful. But, on the other hand, I prefer to be private about losing weight. That’s why I love Buddyslim. That’s why I value the interaction with those without judgement. I’ ll try to get more details. Who knows.

I was in my zone. I was at one with the diet. Then … pizza. Seems harmless, but the one “allowed” piece became two, then three. And an hour later I noticed definite cravings. So much for self control. Bad habits do come easy. But , you know what. I didn’t give up all hope. Today, I have been faithful to the food journal (my favorite tool of restraint) and I’m not beating myself up over yesterday.  This is an important lesson learned, closely listening to my body, my cravings. And what sets them off. I think I’ll be stronger next time.

I know, I’m not even a week into the diet. But I have to brag. I’m holding on. I know from the past that feeling the momentum build from the start allows me to succeed past week one. Cherish the small successes. Sure, I still have weak moments (night nibbles). But through the majority of my day I feel good. There will be more challenges as time goes on. But for now, I’m going to accept that empty gut feeling as a reminder that I’m on the road to being healthier. Good luck to everyone.

Pretty strange title for Day 2 of the diet. But I really think I’m starting the right way. Despite the good intentions of family, I feel I have to do this on my own. Of course, I do remember (last time around) how terrific some buddy support can be from this website. However, I find family members can be too critical about what I’m doing or not doing. I’m being smart. Not starving. Starting an excercise routine. But sometimes I’m just looking for encouragement, not criticism. Good luck to all.

I veered away but now I’m back. Unfortunately, I gained back all the weight lost before. But I’m not going to be discouraged. It was working before. So it would be foolish not to rejoin. And heck! That’s what New Year’s is all about.